Well my baby is seven today....Can't help but think back to when it was just Gary, me, and this new little person we loved more than life itself. God, we were terrified we might do something to hurt her or upset her or screw her up for good. Little did we know how much our lives would forever be changed by her sweet little soul.....
I was pregnant with her almost immediately after our wedding. I think it was two months after we got back from our honeymoon. We were fortunate to not have any trouble conceiving and overall, I had a pretty easy pregnancy. I remember finding out we were having a little girl and being so thrilled. I couldn't wait to dress her up in cute little outfits and take her shopping with me and watch her dance recitals...At 38 weeks, I ended up with pneumonia and was pretty sick. On top of that I had some issues with my sciatic nerve so by 40 weeks, I was done. DONE. But our little princess wasn't quite ready to make her debut. My mom and I tried everything short of taking castor oil to get my labor started. My dr. allowed me to go 14 days past my due date, and my induction was scheduled on day +14. Because my parents lived in Florida at the time, my dad was waiting to come home until I went into labor. My mom was already staying wtih us to help us with any last minute preparations and just in case I went into labor on my own. I wanted her to be there with me, and thank the Lord, she was able to do so. Once the induction was scheduled, my dad went ahead and flew home and I swear, it wasn't after he'd been home more than a few hours that I started labor. It was as though McKenna was just waiting for her Pappy to get to Ohio and be there for us...
So, no induction afterall, right?! Wrong. Got to the hospital and after they broke my water and gave me labor inducing drugs, she still wasn't in any hurry. Ended up having a c-section after a full 24 hours of labor. I was exhausted, and so was Gary. But then, in that one single second of seeing McKenna's face and holding her that very first time, nothing else mattered. Nothing would ever compare to that one single moment. Nothing will ever exceed the amount of love that consumed me, for Gary and for this little baby we created. I couldn't believe she was ours.
In the first days at home with McKenna, I'm not gonna lie, I was a bit foggy. So was Gary. And again, without my mom's help, I'm not sure we would've made it. She changed diapers, let us sleep during the night and gave us every single piece of advice we asked her for. Things started to get easier as we settled into a routine. Mom went back to Florida and Gary went back to work. I decided to not go back to work and there I was, home all day, taking pictures of her to send to my parents , and dressing her up in the thousands of outfits we had gotten for her as gifts. I bet I changed her clothes 3 times a day!
When I think back to the three of us, living in a teeny little house, just scraping by, making ends meet, we were just living on love. We couldn't have been happier. May sound corny but it's true. Gary was working a lot of hours in a job he didn't like and I was going to school 3 nights a week and on the weekends to finish my masters. Nothing mattered except how much we wanted to take care of McKenna, keep her safe,and protect her from this crazy world. We wanted to experience everything with her, and we took her all kinds of places to let her explore and discover and enjoy everything and everyone around her.
Becoming parents changed us for the good. It strengthened our marriage, it opened our eyes to see what was important, and it made me realize that this is what God put me on this Earth to do. Parenthood has it's ups and downs. Some days are good and some days are crazy bad. But every night when I put McKenna, and now Michael also, to bed, and they say, "I love you sweet Mommy", I thank my lucky stars for every blessing I've been given and for the road that led me right here to this spot today.
Happy Birthday to my saving grace, McKenna.... I love you sweet girl....
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Oh how I've missed you....
Geeesh. I can't believe it's been almost 2 months since I've written on here. Once again my dreams of writing on a daily or even weekly basis have been shot down and totally put on the back burner. It seems that whenever I think I will have time to write, something happens or someone gets a boo-boo or needs more milk, or the phone rings, or the dog needs out, you get the idea....But so much has happened in our lives since my last post and I'm anxious to fill you in on some of the details....Writing for me has always been good therapy, so brace yourselves. I've got a lot to say : ) Although, I guess since most of you are on facebook, you probably already know most everything about me and us, but bear with me as I elaborate a little....
Since my previous post, Gary has gotten settled in to life in Pensacola and the three of us are finally into a decent routine here at home. Although I still hate that he's away, I've learned to accept it and try to see the positive in it and move forward from there. I remember when he got his apartment and moved in, I just couldn't get my head around the whole thing. An apartment? For my husband of 8 years? 8 hours away? And I'm happily married? Strange, yes. Overwhelming, yes. Emotional roller coaster, yes. All of the above. But I learned very quickly that you have to roll with the punches and keep on truckin'. Some days are harder than others, but we are managing and surviving here in our little corner of the world. My parents and my best friends have helped me in more ways than I could ever write and sometimes I think they don't realize how much they get me through the bumps in our road.....I thank God for them every day and I know it makes Gary feel a little better to know that we have people looking out for us here.
The hardest part in all of this for me has been all of the little things about Gary that I realize now I took for granted and got annoyed with for no apparent reason.....Which is probably a good thing for our marriage because I find myself now being so much more appreciative of him and the father and husband and friend to me that he is. I miss him sitting by me on the couch in the evening and how he is so slow to fast forward through the commercials on the DVR. I miss him sitting out in the garage taking a nap, which used to drive me insane. I'd be in the house with the kids fighting and there he is just snoozin' away, all cozy and happy in the garage. I can't tell you how many times in the past two months, I've walked into the garage and just wished I'd see him sitting there asleep in his lawn chair. Oh, and the snoring.....Believe it or not, I miss the snoring next to me, sometimes within seconds of us going to bed. I used to be like, "Are you kidding me? He was just talking to me, and now he's snoring?!" But oh what I wouldn't give to have him there next to me at night....
As for Gary, people ask me a lot how he's doing in Pensacola. And truthfully, I think it is much harder on him than us. My good friend, Jaime, recently told me this and I think it's so true. She said, "Remember, you have one person to miss and he's got three." I never thought of it that way, but when she said it, it resonated with me. It's kinda funny, actually. He's always telling me how he misses the noise in the house and the chaos that is our little Michael....All the while, I'm begging for quiet and alone time and what I wouldn't give for a meal by myself!
But anyways, his job is going well and I'm so proud of him for being there and doing this. He is doing what needed to be done for our family, and regardless of how hard it is on us, we both knew that God led him to it and it was what needed to be done at the time. I truly believe that it will make us stronger and better people.
And now for some fun stuff....We have a new puppy that was a HUGE surprise for our little ones. Emmie is her name and she is the sweetest little thing. In fact, I think my dad may be more in love with her than we are. She is 14 weeks old, getting better on the house training, and as playful as can be. It has brought such joy to the kids, almost too much if you ask me. I can't say that I love the delightful squeals and hilarious (and LOUD) laughter at 6 am, but I guess it could be worse ;-) Momma just needs her coffee before anything LOUD in the morning!!!
School is winding down for McKenna, I can't believe she's going to be going into second grade and will be turning seven this month. What happened to my little baby?! She's just like her mommy , busy planning what kind of birthday party she wants and what the theme and color scheme will be. The apple doesn't fall from the tree in this case! Michael is loving his little preschool class at the YMCA and just keeps asking me, "But Mommy, when can I ride the bus?" Baby steps, little man....Mommy is nowhere near ready to send you off on a school bus....I can barely stand the fact that he is growing out of the cuddles in the morning and the "Mommy, hold me!" phase. Like most of my other mommy friends, I'm sad to see them grow up so fast, but I know it's my job to let them go and be the capable, responsible, little people they are meant to be.
Well, that's it for now. It's Thursday night and that means "Swamp People" is on TV. I just wish Gary was here to watch with me and talk in his best cajun accent that I love....
Good night ya'll.
j.
Since my previous post, Gary has gotten settled in to life in Pensacola and the three of us are finally into a decent routine here at home. Although I still hate that he's away, I've learned to accept it and try to see the positive in it and move forward from there. I remember when he got his apartment and moved in, I just couldn't get my head around the whole thing. An apartment? For my husband of 8 years? 8 hours away? And I'm happily married? Strange, yes. Overwhelming, yes. Emotional roller coaster, yes. All of the above. But I learned very quickly that you have to roll with the punches and keep on truckin'. Some days are harder than others, but we are managing and surviving here in our little corner of the world. My parents and my best friends have helped me in more ways than I could ever write and sometimes I think they don't realize how much they get me through the bumps in our road.....I thank God for them every day and I know it makes Gary feel a little better to know that we have people looking out for us here.
The hardest part in all of this for me has been all of the little things about Gary that I realize now I took for granted and got annoyed with for no apparent reason.....Which is probably a good thing for our marriage because I find myself now being so much more appreciative of him and the father and husband and friend to me that he is. I miss him sitting by me on the couch in the evening and how he is so slow to fast forward through the commercials on the DVR. I miss him sitting out in the garage taking a nap, which used to drive me insane. I'd be in the house with the kids fighting and there he is just snoozin' away, all cozy and happy in the garage. I can't tell you how many times in the past two months, I've walked into the garage and just wished I'd see him sitting there asleep in his lawn chair. Oh, and the snoring.....Believe it or not, I miss the snoring next to me, sometimes within seconds of us going to bed. I used to be like, "Are you kidding me? He was just talking to me, and now he's snoring?!" But oh what I wouldn't give to have him there next to me at night....
As for Gary, people ask me a lot how he's doing in Pensacola. And truthfully, I think it is much harder on him than us. My good friend, Jaime, recently told me this and I think it's so true. She said, "Remember, you have one person to miss and he's got three." I never thought of it that way, but when she said it, it resonated with me. It's kinda funny, actually. He's always telling me how he misses the noise in the house and the chaos that is our little Michael....All the while, I'm begging for quiet and alone time and what I wouldn't give for a meal by myself!
But anyways, his job is going well and I'm so proud of him for being there and doing this. He is doing what needed to be done for our family, and regardless of how hard it is on us, we both knew that God led him to it and it was what needed to be done at the time. I truly believe that it will make us stronger and better people.
And now for some fun stuff....We have a new puppy that was a HUGE surprise for our little ones. Emmie is her name and she is the sweetest little thing. In fact, I think my dad may be more in love with her than we are. She is 14 weeks old, getting better on the house training, and as playful as can be. It has brought such joy to the kids, almost too much if you ask me. I can't say that I love the delightful squeals and hilarious (and LOUD) laughter at 6 am, but I guess it could be worse ;-) Momma just needs her coffee before anything LOUD in the morning!!!
School is winding down for McKenna, I can't believe she's going to be going into second grade and will be turning seven this month. What happened to my little baby?! She's just like her mommy , busy planning what kind of birthday party she wants and what the theme and color scheme will be. The apple doesn't fall from the tree in this case! Michael is loving his little preschool class at the YMCA and just keeps asking me, "But Mommy, when can I ride the bus?" Baby steps, little man....Mommy is nowhere near ready to send you off on a school bus....I can barely stand the fact that he is growing out of the cuddles in the morning and the "Mommy, hold me!" phase. Like most of my other mommy friends, I'm sad to see them grow up so fast, but I know it's my job to let them go and be the capable, responsible, little people they are meant to be.
Well, that's it for now. It's Thursday night and that means "Swamp People" is on TV. I just wish Gary was here to watch with me and talk in his best cajun accent that I love....
Good night ya'll.
j.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)